December 2023
Rijswijk City
Normally I get sick in these winter months. But not this time…
The movement in my bodyflow from last summer was still there. I chose the local restaurant to work. But didn’t really like it much. The work itself was okay but doing catering in winter is not that lucrative. Wanted to do it purely temporarily, but that wasn’t in line with what the manager had in mind. And a strangling contract I wasn’t waiting for that. Flexibility in my schedule is intensely important to me. Especially now that I’m starting to get more of a feel for the film business….By the way, it was a pretty chill job otherwise. It was a nice thing to be part of the Chinese culture. Fantastic colleagues.But I found that too much emphasis was placed on certain aspects from managment. Things I just already knew and didn’t find challenging to do.Besides, I missed the sun. Daylight. I felt more like a vampire at this time and preferred to sleep out all winter…until spring would come again…I decided to spend a few nights at Eleanor’s villa on the beach….
Eleanor: In winter you shouldn’t work. You should go on vacation. Look for warm places. Otherwise you stop every time. You’re not a dark times person anymore, you follow the light….
Me: I understand you completely, but yes I want to keep busy
Eleanor: you have to do that then in the light.
Just watch…
She took me to her Jacuzzi. The technician who helped her had installed lights here and totally lit up the bathroom..there was a dial that made the lights flash just like a Christmas light. And completely A.I. controlled by her voice. On command it turned sky blue. I slid into the swirling mass of foaming water. Pleasantly warm. Very pleasant and rested my head and looked at the ceiling which was painted with luminous stars. That wasn’t there last time.
Eleanor joined me. Her light brown complexion from the summer sun had given way to a white pallor. She placed her pale feet on the edge of the jacuzzi, folded over each other. She asked for two glasses of Beaujolais. Who was she talking to I wondered? From a hatch on the wall appeared a wooden bottle holder with a bottle of Beaujolaisย
Me: wow, it just listens to your voice!
Eleanor: It’s robot controlled only it doesn’t quite work yet, the glasses didn’t come with it so we drink from the bottle then.
She moved the bottle up and down and screwed off the cap. “Taste it,” she said. It tasted exquisite. Good year. The sugars had converted well. The tanine hit you right away.
After a while we were quite tipsy and sang Christmas songs. Eleanor really knew a lot of them. Logical she was a lot older than me so she had quite a lot of life experience and a bit more music knowledge. The warmth of the water in the Jacuzzi kept us drunk. Super nice feeling.ย
Then she took the floor and then said “, blend colors”. A light-fest of colors appeared throughout the bathroom. Gosh the mechanic had really done his best by the looks of it. The colors adjusted to the time of night. It looked like we were in the sea with sky blue sky. The artificial sound of a steamboat and flying holograms of seagulls made the whole thing ultra realistic.
The wine, of course, provided a bit more depth. The sensation feeling was fine tuned.ย
We continued to float blissfully in her Jacuzzi. We secretly touched each other….under water.ย
Nice to be with Eleanor again. I told her I would return to the beach in the spring. She would eagerly wait for me…
even if it took
foreverย
————————————————————————-
Present Times
Eden Mansion
Tomboy: how are the film assignments going?
Me: almost a year of acting/acting and super happy with it
Tomboy: only a year and so many productions already?ย
This can trigger jealousy you know that
Me: I do not care about that
Tomboy: Well, you should.
Me: what for?
Tomboy: diva behavior? Star allures?
Me: who me?
Tomboy: just kidding, because you have an art background your expressiveness will always be misinterpreted by jealous people, remember that Danny. Your expressiveness is spot on by the way. What others think of it you should disregard. Your path is not someone else’s path.
Me: I don’t actually care what anyone thinks . As a cosmic pantheist, I’m immune to that.
Tomboy: explain..
Me: You have permission to adore me
Satire isn’t for everyone either….
Tomboy: so now that you’ve also taken acting classes you’re continuing in the business?
Me: yes indeed! I notice it on certain productions where directors are already seeing that while I’m just an extra. And I think they realize that I want to go further than just acting.
Tomboy: facial expressions, body language, then text roles, I notice that you are trained in them.
Me: this is because I used to model for visual arts and sometimes still do. The threshold I had to set then can be an advantage in other forms of art, like acting.
Tomboy: You are not only movie special, also writer, painter, model for arts , and almost full-fledged actor.
Me: …and also performance art and doing theater stage plays occasionally
Doesn’t mean so much yo. Its just my expression of art.
People do ask about it sometimes very ostentatiously I notice.ย
Tomboy: don’t tell anything, show your performance on stage, films and series.ย And fuck what they thinking of..
Me: Hell Yeah!
Tomboy: You will meet good people in this profession who really stimulate you to unprecedented heights, and also people who look at you with disgust. You have to understand that.
Me: someone with a conservative primitive mindset always has troubles with my expressive abilities. Whether as an extra or as a model or as an actor. A normal person who is on the same wavelength as me understands me completely. So I’m used to that by now. Besides, it’s immediately noticeable when someone like that is suddenly present on a film set who doesn’t really belong….
Tomboy: follow auditions and follow your own path and throw your greatest strength into battle
Me: and that is?
Tomboy: You can get along with e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e and everybody. And you have a modern mindset. People with a primitive mindset can’t stand that.
Me: seriously I really don’t concern myself with that, I’m not responsible for anyone’s opinion. I respect your opinion but your opinion is not my opinion….
Tomboy: opinions are disposable…
Me: anyway… i’m really looking forward to the new productions and assignments
Tomboy: you are on the verge of a time where you are going to get quite a lot of assignments and not the least also since you already have acting experience. Besides, an acting education is not even necessary because you can already act.
Me: I hear that more often than not. Still, I want to gain additional experience…thanks in part to the film people I work with, this will come. I am sincerely grateful to them for that. It gives a huge boost. Most extras you build something with as well. Nice people who motivate you and vice versa.
Tomboy: The strides you are making are going fast and hard, too bad if someone can’t keep up….
Can I be a little fan of you?
Me: I’d rather you be a fan of my qualities instead of me then. ๐
That’s how I see it with my cinematography heroes. Their celebrity status doesn’t interest me. It’s the acting qualities what I adore. The way someone puts a certain spin on a character or gives a performance. I can enjoy that immensely.
Tomboy: Suppose I also want to act in film, which casting agency should I go to in The Netherlands ? What are the best ones according to your expierences?
Me: All have their qualities you know, but the best experiences until now are Casting4 and Dynamic Casting in particular and B&F also in a way. Those three have meant the most to me so far. Getting to asked for the best films and series. Everything goes well through this casting agencies. Beyond perfection.ย Got many roles from them. And very professional.
From briefing to catering to payment. These are really the three best so far. Respect!!!
Tomboy: do you ever do roles without a casting agency?
Me: yes, but it’s important to coordinate well regarding payments etc. Because that can sometimes go wrong.
Tomboy: So that means a delay in payment, you mean?
Me: Yes, and that doesn’t really give you an impuls to go back to an individual casting. I think you understand that too, don’t you? I’d rather have cash on the set from now on with individuals.ย
Tomboy: maybe you’ll get interest ๐
Me: whatever Tomboy (…. sigh…)
November 2023
Scheveningenย
Deepak and I were deeply impressed by Chandramukhi’s dancing skills. Like a wild goose, she shook her hips to the Bollywood classics from her own curated compilation. We clapped our hands together. What moves!ย
Deepak: Check out this girl!
Me: Whoa!
Chandramukhi was having a blast. She was a bit over the moon because she had also met Rosamund. And it was an instant hit. But for kundalini yoga, she had to wait a little longer. After all, Chandramukhi was “poisoned” by love and couldn’t clear her mind enough, because she was in love with Rosamund
Deepak did understand it takes a certain conscious level to do this. “Your thoughts and head must be completely empty,” I added. “Totally agree , said Deepak”
Everything I said Deepak also agreed by the way.
Chandramukhi: tss are you in love with Danny or something Deepak?
Deepak: maybe ..a little bit
Did he mean this ironically or did he mean it? I didn’t think anything bad about it. I think he wanted to do me. Honestly? He was the right age. Young curious and cute face. Big hands but very hairy. Ughh turnoff!!! I don’t like hairy. It has to be smooth.
Yet he had something feminine. Totally not macho tight cheekbones, eyes deep in the sockets. And full lips. Hmmm to kiss right away. Chandramukhi saw the way I looked at him. She recognized that look from thousands. The look that spoke volumes. The sociopathic staring look. That typical in me when I look at someone and like them. Bizarre, how do women always recognize this in me anyway?
Chandramukhi: Watch out Deepak, Danny is just undressing you with his eyes
Deepak: so what…why do you bother?ย
Chandramukhi understood and left us alone. She was sweaty and tired from dancing and went to freshen up. “Get him in the mouth” she whispered in my ear. “Shhht, go away Chan,” I snapped at her. “Do you like beer?” asked Deepak to me with his sweet baby face. “Yes of course!” Deepak smelled like coconut oil. Sat in his beautiful hair. When we opened the bottles he looked at me.
Deepak: I want to tell you something….
Me: yes tell me
Deepak: I want you…
When someone says this to me I don’t know what to say because I perceive this as a compliment. I then said:
Me : I want you too
Deepak: right now?
Me: right here..
From the bathroom, Chandramukhi shouted to put a sheet on her couch. She exaggerated. We just wanted to kiss for a while. But actually a little more. I spontaneously got an erection. Because of the vibe but also because Chandramukhi as it were guided us in what was to come soon….
That was immensely horny. Deepak’s eyes sank even deeper and he opened his mouth. He put his head down. And just then the doorbell rang
Me: fuck!
It scared the shit out of us. No worries. Chandramukhi had ordered roti again. The Hindu delivery man looked at us as if he saw a bunch of ghosts. Quickly he made his way out and Chandramukhi closed the door. She looked at both of us and put the food on the table.
Chandramukhi : for later ..first you two play….
Me : what the fuck?
Deepak : wow?
Forcibly Deepak had to play with my erection. And that while Chandramukhi was watching. This was incredibly powerful. Just think about it: I don’t even like Hindus. But now for a moment I did. Deepak had that typical slut look when he got close to my erection. He played and massaged me. Chandramukhi pretended she was busy setting the table. But secretly enjoyed it too. So was I. I undid his pants. Nice looking penis. Fantastic exactly like me. The surprise effect would soon come about. And incredibly his phallus was erect huge. A solid massive tower. It was a little fidgeting together under the watchful eye of Chandramukhi. She wanted me to take a shower with him. And then she wanted to watch. Totally fine. We gave her what she wanted. She enjoyed it. So did we. Really a nice guy was Deepak.ย
The three of us then philosophized about life and issues that concerned us.
Chandramukhi: we are in the Kaliyug
Deepak: end of times….
Me: all’s well that ends well
The kali yug freely translated is the age of Kali. The destructive part in the time era. The manifestation of total destruction. Kali was the dark destructive force of goddess Parvati. The companion of Shiva. That said enough…According to legend, she was called by the people to kill the local demon. But she could not do that in her normal form as Parvati, she then became Kali. The goddess of death and destruction. In that form she killed the demon but she continued in her urge to kill. She left a trail of destruction. One area after another was massacred and destroyed. There was no stopping her. And really nothing could stop her. No demon no god , nothing.
Kali was unstoppable. So badly broken in her urge to kill that only Shiva could stop her. Yet Shiva thought of something. He knew better than anyone how to calm his wife down.ย
He smeared himself with the burned ashes of the victims Kali had left behind. And lay down dead among the corpses. When Kali stepped on him she was shocked. For this was her husband! This was enough for her. She could no longer do so much harm. She then assumed her original form again and became the sweet Parvati again.ย
From the dark demonic spirit to the light godly entity
Her energy merged with that of Shiva. The Shakti which ruled then had come into balance. The sweet part was for Parvati. The destructive part remained with Shiva.
We listen in swoon to the free translation Chandramukhi told us. The symbolism behind it is the total overpowering of life. And its acceptance in the end.ย
Deepak: tantra…
I nodded along as well. It was actually much deeper but this was broadly what it was about.ย
Me: Chandamukhi, can you tell us about the KamaSutra?
September 2023
Eden Mansion
Rosamund had now rolled up her yoga mat and I assigned her room. She would only be staying with us for a few days.ย
She was not very surprised to see the naked people walking in the building. She did, however, sneak a peek . She was used to it. But didn’t really expect it so to speak.
Me: do you feel uncomfortable ?
Rosamund: no worries getting used to it but is fine
Me: I noticed she was upset about something.
I figured it out she didn’t have a companion. She had always stayed alone. She did have a salamander in England but you couldn’t go to dinner with that. I told her I did know someone. That, of course, was Chandramukhi. They could become friends.I would like to see them together..
She jumped up from her bed and I showed her a picture. She immediately fell in love. “Shall I bring you together? “I asked her. Rosamund agreed. In appreciation, she gave me a lecture on awareness through yoga. It didn’t even matter which form of yoga you did. The unification with your body and the serenity you experience is already unprecedented. Meanwhile, she was making her bed. And asked if she could place candles and incense in the room. “No problem at all” I told her. What I wondered was why she was called Rosamund when she was half-blood.
Me : don’t you have a Hindu name like most Hindus do
Rosamund : you may also call me Roshniย
I looked at her and gave her a smile. Roshni means : the one who brings the light.
Indeed that name does suit her. As I walked down the aisle of Eden Mansion I messagedย Chandramukhi. She was into it. Having a half-breed is always nice she knew from experience. In between I got an email I saw from Phoebe. I had not seen her for a long time. It would be time…soon.
September 2023
Scheveningen
Disco was the theme this time for the beach club’s final party. The preparations were in full swing, but not yet because in the meantime the bell was ringing at the hatch…not once, twice but 10 at a time. It was an emergency!
Chef : Kom op dan! Lopuhh!
Bartender: zo doe es ff rustig yo, we komen eraan!!!
From all corners employees appeared at the hatch. Both of the handymen, the two bartenders, even the gentleman from the sink was off his mark. And I too took a sprint and rushed to the hatch…arriving there, there was only 1 plate of fries with croquettes….
Handy1: Jesus wat een drama
Handy2 : huh, waar is de rest?
Chef: ja he he, die zijn natuurlijk al weggebracht troetelmuts, breng je deze ook ff weg lieverd, als-je-blieft?!
At the same time the sous chef asked where his coffee was. For the third time by the way. I became para and turned to the bartender and shouted:
“two coffees please!!!
now!!!!”
And promptly two coffees were ready….
Sous chef: who is the best๐
The sous chef struck a pose and did a Namaste greeting. Every time amazing how he did this. Peace had returned and it was a quiet moment for a moment. I grabbed my cloth and took a couple of trays. And then refilled the napkins. The sauces were still fairly full. And the patio was pretty much neat as well. The manager came up to me and I was allowed to go home. My shift was over. As usual, I then took a seat at the bar and enjoyed my glass of bon vivant. The tastiest beer there is. I asked the bartender what was planned for the final party. Only thing she could say was that pretty much everyone would be coming. That’s all I could get out of her. Meanwhile, there was an upbeat music fest going on in the kitchen. I took one look and got sucked into the vibe. Incredibly pleasant moments. Moments that will soon be gone. At least for this season….
September 2023
Eden Mansion
The new yoga teacher had arrived. A half-breed. Half British half Indian. Rosamund was her name. An extraordinary lady. And with quite a lot of knowledge. She had lived for years in India among the yogis and had mastered the basic principles of yoga. I was completely in a trance when she told me about Kundalini yoga. That is the most dangerous form of yoga. True, you need the first three chakras to activate it. But the power development after that takes place…out there. i asked her what happens when you activate all the chakras. Body expansion, clairvoyance, seeing with your extrasensory senses. Being able to feel sound. Being able to see energy. Experiencing light as photons. The true nature of the cosmos as it really is. The Adiyoga the connection with Shiva. The true manifestation of power.
An unprecedented form of yoga by the way that cannot be done without some guidance. A guru is necessary here. So Rosamund was the guru to tell us about this. She was curious to know who wanted to join in. Everyone had left the room…except me
We started with a mantra and as if by some miracle I begin to feel it. Wow this was totally different kind of yoga. The combination of the mantra with the configuration of your body poses brought the chakras into a position that made them open more easily. And then suddenly something from down came up through my intestines and flew through my body above my head, i couldnt describe this energy boost. It was far beyond my comprehension..
October 2023
Scheveningen
It was quite windy at the Pier of Scheveningen. Bella and me were walking and looking at the scenery of the end of this season. he force of the autumn wind almost blew her from the Pier.
She held me tightly as we ate an ice cream….
Bella: do you like working in the bakery?
Danny: mwuaa, not really don’t think I stay there long. Ill keep it temporary
Bella: how about that then?
Danny: boring. And the cash register is too complicated. Everything is mixed up. It takes time to get through that. I don’t get that much time from the bakery. So just staying here for a while
Bella: doing really early morning shifts in the fall, I’m not looking forward to that myself.
Danny: not only that. I miss the thrill of beach life. The guests at a bakery are different from, say, the beach club where I worked. Customers at a bakery are mainly elderly not that i am against old people but the vibe then becomes rather corny. It is a different vibe
Bella: But you do lock up well, right?
I’ll do that anyway I told her, I think I’ll break the contract and then hand in my clothes and head for my next adventure…Maybe back to Scheveningen….
September 2023
Scheveningen
It was a crazy disco party organized by the beach club. For now, the staff was put in the spotlight. Full house and almost all staff were present. I had an outfit that was disco chiq. Neat jacket but still fancy. Nice creations passed by. Glitter, wigs, suits. The 70’s style. The club was also well designed according to the theme. There was a place reserved for the DJ who would arrive later. And on the terrace a place with delicious food and drinks. You could go to the bar yourself for beer and wine. And there was a photo booth. A collegue and me immediately took a photo together. One of my favorite collegue to work with by the way. All in fact. Also other collegues tried out the photobooth
Various props were there so that we could have our picture taken together. It was fantastic. It’s special to be the guest yourself for once. A nice briefing followed from the best handyman of the club, followed by the assistant. A quiz with fun questions. And then I found out that the boss is younger than the mistress and has gone to art school. What a hero! Hence the click. A group photo with all of us. And then the party started. We did naughty things on the beach and then again had a rap battle. The DJ was now in a higher mood and played fun disco classics alternated with contemporary beats. In between we went rowing, played beer pong, drank more and danced. With everyone. What a love.
The chef and sous chef wanted to take a picture with me in the photo booth.
I got a kiss from both of them when the photo was shot.Sandwiched by kisses from these two loco people haha. Beautiful nice people that I will never forget.
Then dance again. And drinking again and partying on the beats of the DJ
Everyone participated.
The boss, the boss” wife, the kitchen staff, the terrace employees, the runners. The chef took me aside and then said:
“making memories”
That…was so true
The best time of my life. The beginning of a new era had begun here for me. All credits to this fantastic beach club at the harbor next to the surf club. Grown enormously in all aspects. Received so much direction and a baggage full of immense possibilities.
Thank you dear people for this wonderful time at this beach club
it was amazing!
Forever grateful โค๏ธ
September 2023
Eden Mansion
Rosamund reassured me as I activated my chakras. I felt an enormous serene calmness that I could transfer. The real energy is not in matter, Rosamund said.
This energy comes from the dark matter. The real power. This was the craziest form of yoga. This was not what I got in regular yoga classes. This was different.
This is a well-known phenomenon in Vedic science. So it is quite normal for yogis who practice this. But a Westerner can experience this shockingly. The deepest of the deepest. Our senses have limits in the material world. As a result, we only see a fraction of the light spectrum. But not during this form of yoga…
You see everything. And that is really true. However, the most dangerous part is returning to the material body. So that process received support from Rosamund. She was great at this. It is bizarre to feel how you come back to earth. I tripped over my yoga mat and fell forward.
Rosamund said it’s quite normal because I’m returning back into my psycical body from my astral body. I realized that i truely wen out of my physical boundaries of matter.
I thanked her for this experience.
For the first time I experienced what it was like to pass through dimensions without any substance. It was like being stoned or drunk. But without weed and alcohol. This was purely natural. That’s how it could be done, I thought. Kundalini yoga is also a topic that many scientists are concerned with. It really happens and these vedic principles of this form of yoga was widely practiced by people from all walks of life. The tea I got afterwards felt like I was drinking tea for the first time. My esophagus had to get used to this again. I was curious about Rosamund and asked if she had a boyfriend. She did have a relationship, but with a woman. She had never had a relationship with a man before. It didn’t really bother me that much either. Non relevant. She asked if I was in a relationship. Well… occasionally, but not binding. There are so many fruits on the tree, she said with a smile, so somehow she could understand it. I not only like the fruits, I said, but also the leaves, the branches and sometimes pieces of the bark, and sometimes also the root of the tree. Aha, she said, you are pansexual.
The first person I didn’t tell myself about my sexuality…but came up with it myself…and it was completely fine. I looked deep into her eyes. Spiritual scientific vedic. Rosamund was a special girl…
November 2023
Scheveningen
Brrr, it was fucking cold. Winter had arrived early and it showed. The whole vibe I normally had in mind was completely smashed on the harbour. After helping my customers with a herring sandwich, tasty pastry and, above all, lots of fries, I walked to the tram. A familiar face. Chandramukhi! What is she doing here?
Chandramukhi: I was curious how you were doing, you’re so hard to reach man, gosh!
Me: oh yes that is to save data for my phone. Airplane mode means your battery won’t drain as quickly
Chandramukhi: I understood that you had done Kundalini Yoga, how was it?
Me: eye-opener
Chandramukhi: Shiva’s yoga is the most dangerous form you can do.
Me: no worries, I received the right coaching.
Chandramukhi: Would you like to watch Bollywood movies with me?
Me: of course
I went to her house and first ate a roti with potato/long beans and vegan snacks. Chandramukhi put on a movie and one song after another was sung.In Bollywood films it is common that it is not the actor or actress themselves who sing a song when there is a dance scene….
Chandramukhi: Did you know that Bollywood movies has an greater audience then Hollywood movies?
Me: i know that. But Hollywood productions cost more and earn more ๐
Chandramukhi: And did you know that Asha Bhosle has sung the most songs ever?
Me: Not Kishore Kumar?
Chandramukhi: no, he was the most popular. The all-rounder. Every actor wanted him as a playback singer.
Me: No wonder he still has won the most filmfare awards as best singer to date
Chandramukhi: In fact, he was nominated in the best playback singer category with only his songs.
Me: That’s right, I know, it wasn’t even a question that he was going to win. But with which number
Chandramukhi: he was super eccentric and quite a weirdo
Me: He was quite crazy but a genius.
Chandramukhi: he was the best, he was also converted to all possible religions and then not again. in fact, he was actually an atheist. But he loved Christian movies.
Me: there was something mystical about him
Chandramukhi: special person. I recently met someone from Hindi classes and I would like to introduce you to him. He is very interested in you
Me: oh really? A Sugar Daddy?
Chandramukhi: Call it a Sugar cousin
A little later after Chandramukhi had texted Sugar’s nephew, the doorbell rang. A light-skinned young man stood in the doorway. At least not really a boy. I think it’s non-binary. Because there was something feminine about him. It did appeal to me. A little younger than me. Still pristine and innocent. Chandramukhi matched me well and introduced me to him
Me: hi nice to meet you…Deepak
Present Times
Eden Mansion
Tomboy: so if I understand correctly, you will be going abroad soon.
Me: yes, first work on the beach for a few months and then work and live there. Not alone, of course, but with like-minded folks, and I can also do my hobbies over there
Tomboy: that’s really great, because then you also have international experience, with your film assignments and art as well.
Me: for that reason and in between you can take leave and then I will be back in the Netherlands for a few days for the premiere of films or for family, but mainly I will first take a holiday here and there and not go all out here.
Tomboy: that’s good, you shouldn’t work in the winter anyway, but just take a holiday and actually also in between, you’ve worked too much lately and you can now take some rest. Work an average of 2 to 3 days. Because otherwise you will get overload. And focus on film and art assignments, that is your destination and your talent will be better reflected there. And take holidays once in a while.
Me: I enjoy working in the catering industry, but to be honest. Soon enough i will be endorsed into the film industry. But this combo is not bad at all for the moment
Tomboy: I notice you’re being offered more roles. So I have every reason to be a fan of yours.
Tomboy knew exactly what my destiny is and where I will continue it. And with this range of options, I have almost infinite options to do.
—————————–the end———————————
Coming Soon
Eden Part XIX: Phoebe
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